Hey,
while I totally understand your money concerns- as I get myself pretty worked up too- trying to think of a not too corny analogy. You are coming down from a mountaintop (stability) but if you can either avoid reaching the valley or get intervention fast enough you can minimise your time in the value (low mood). Staying well is an ongoing process. You sense yourself going into a depressive episode you need to notify a healthcare professional. It might be about adjusting meds, something with sleep, diet, work, stress, need for more support- professional or family or even like you are wary of- hospitalisation in order to stay safe. However, by leaving it- your options decrease and the level of mental health goes from manageable to acute. Hospitalisation may be longer, or you put yourself more at risk of relapse. talk to someone who has the ability to assess you or direct you to someone who can. Don't self- diagnose. You know yourself, and in order to stay well or return to being stable you need to know it is okay to need more support sometimes. Don't do it alone. Keep asking for help until you find someone who listens. Your friends sound like they don't understand how MH issues work. Hang in there.
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