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Old 08-06-2014, 05:17 PM   #4
in_BPD_hell
 
Join Date: Nov 2013
Location: England
I am currently:

Hi Thanks both for your replies.
I feel grateful for CMHT 'taking me on!' but as I said I only see a psychiatrist for 10 minutes every few months and then sort of left to the chaos I am creating for myself (unintentionally). In an ideal world I would like a CPN or someone I can ring when I am feeling distressed and then hopefully learn to not be so dependant on them in time. But I feel really lonely. I feel that I cant keep bothering my GP, as she is so busy and keeps telling me she doesn't have a magic wand and cant make me better, but she can pray for me!!! which, for me, isn't very reassuring!

I wish my therapy was sooner, but I know I just have to wait. I have waited 6 months already.

I also have some issues with my current psych as its a locum, and a man who isn't working with me very well. That's my own fault, so I've not been able to tell him how desperate I feel, because with men if I show weakness I feel he will hurt me.. my rational head knows that isn't the case... but my poorly side cant let my guard down with him, like I could do with my proper psych... if that makes sense.

Basically I think I need to have someone I can ring when Im suicidal or severely distressed.



I don't understand myself... I'm searching for the person I am, and the person I want to be..

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