Picking up that blade again will turn out to be one of the biggest mistakes of your life. You'll face choices, choices you shoul never have to make but you know what? You'll make them and you'll learn there is no right or wrong, no choice is perfect. Things are going to get tough (er) but in two years you won't be at home. Appreciate the people who try and help and the small gestures they do to show they care. Write them down, remember them. They will be worth more than any of the crap stuff.
The longer you hide your secrets and use harming to form your identity, to cope, to show your pain, the harder it will be to helpfully express your emotions and to have fun and find happiness and good friends. It's ok not to be perfect. The occasional 'B' is not the end of the world. Just keep talking. Don't end up that girl who seeks attention and care by landing herself in and out of psych wards, overdosing, being jealous of other people's self harm, cutting yourself to pieces. You're not going to get anywhere. By then you'll be an adult and 'should' be at least trying to be responsible. The sooner you start to talk and accept help and ask for it, the easier things will be.
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