Hi Muru,
I completely understand that therapy is scaring you. Do you have a close friend that could come with you? Sometimes they let someone else join a session if someone is really scared.
When I started therapy I was scared and it was really hard for me to say anything. It took me 9 weeks in hospital until I managed to offer a little bit on information without being specifically asked (and me usually just not saying anything).
Also want to add, that it is brave to write about your memory in such detail here.
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