I don't belong here.
Well isn't that the anthem of my life? I have always been a part of something but have never been allowed to belong. For once I would like to make long term plans with the streets of a town and the people in them. I hate the feeling of looking into the eyes staring back at you and knowing that they will inevitably disappear. One day...
Moving again. It's bittersweet. I wish I could stay here. Better yet, I wish I could want to stay here. I want to be near my family, but unfortunately for me being near the people I care the most about is unhealthy. Now there is some irony for you. Staying hurts, leaving hurts...it's just a matter of which one hurts the least. I thought it was supposed to be about what made you the happiest.
Maybe it's just me. Maybe I am the problem. That makes the most sense, I think, even though I know it's not the truth. But if I was the problem, I could fix it. Right now I can't fix anything.
So I'm leaving.
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