View Single Post
Old 12-11-2007, 10:37 AM   #7
hoping_one day
 
hoping_one day's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2007
Location: Yorkshire
I am currently:

To every single one of you, thank you from the bottom of my heart.
Your support is so incredibly touching and I just wish I could give you all an enormous hug and thank you for believing in me, especially at a time when I can't believe in myself.
I just feel like I've had the stuffing knocked right out of me. This is the second year it has happened. They through me off last year too, which broke me in two. I passed my first teaching placement with flying colours, I just couldn't understand it.
They reconsidered and for 9 months I have believed I could finally make this happen and 2 weeks ago they changed their mind again and I've just crumpled.
I don't feel I've any fight in me left, I can't pick myself up off the floor and I've never been not been able to bounce back before. Just feels like they've ripped my heart out and stamped all over it. This isn't just a career to me, it's a passion and I know I could succeed in it if they'd just give me a chance.
I just keep crying, and can't stop, I think it's just a huge crisis of confidence and I can't cope with it anymore. Sorry, I must sound so hopeess. I'm trying to pull myself together but it just hurts so much.
I don't want to SI over this, because the logical part of my brain just knows it would be playing straight into their hands.
I will fight this. I will fight for my right to be here, I've been doing that all my life and I'm not stopping now. I just can't seem to find the strength to start.

Just want to crawl into a corner and cry for a bit.

hoping_one day is offline   Reply With Quote