[crazykat]

I have been debating whether to make this or not. So I hope it is okay to post. Over the past week and a bit my anxiety has got so bad that has left me pretty much housebound. Apart from walking to the end of the street with my case manager on Wednesday and ending up in A&E last night I haven't left the house. Just the thought of it makes me feel sick. I feel constantly on edge and often feel like I am suffocating. I can't continue to live like this, it is making me not want to be alive anymore just because I can't cope with this extreme level of anxiety.

Anyways as for last night, it was a bad night. I rang up lifeline because I felt quite unsafe. They were quite concerned so rang the police and ambulance, personally I think they overreacted. I waited 2 hours before I even saw a doctor. He gave me some valium to calm me down because I was pretty worked up. Said he would come and see me again in 15 minutes. I waited another few hours by this time I getting more anxious so I asked them what was happening as I couldn't wait any longer. They told me I had to stay until I saw a person from psych but they couldn't see me until after 8. The psych person eventually came and saw me just before 9am. I got to A&E at 2:30am so it was a long night.

She said I could go home on the condition I ring them if I feel like I want to take an overdose. She has also put me on alert with the psych team over this weekend and they will call me each night to check in with me. I know I need to do something to shift this otherwise it is only going to get worse but it feels so overwhelming so some encouragement would be nice. Thanks for listening, sorry this is soo long.