We've had several arguments since. I used to cry when stuff like this would happen; now I don't even care. Sad thing is if I just had sex with him this would all go away. But I can't make myself want to when I don't feel it's because he cares about me. Sex has just become a task on a checklist. I've crossed this point where I literally don't care what he does and I don't know how to fix this in me even if he does follow through with counseling like he says he will... It's like I just suddenly ran out of emotion with this. It's scary yet freeing feeling this numb to it. At least here I can't be hurt by it. And at least I know I can survive on my own now. But also then what is the point in being here if I don't care? I feel like I should care, but I just can't right now. :/
|