maybe you could tell the people who try to "help out" with your disability that you'd like to do more things for yourself... sometimes people don't even realize when they're treating you like you can't manage. good intentions can accidentally go to far, and if you point that out in a respectful way ("i know you're meaning to help, and i really appreciate that, but i'd like to try to do this myself/make this choice for myself... if i need you i'll call, ok?") they'll often step back..
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