Hi
I think that's why I was so cross because I could still sense the fear in your writing.
The fact is everything you have achieved has been because of your own strength of character and all the things that are a problem in your head are there because of them! and they don't seem sorry or like they want to make anything better.
When I realised that I was the same age as my parents when they had me and would not treat a child that way is when I started stopping them putting me down, by mentioning how they behaved at my age and that I actually was better. I have quite a lot of siblings though so it makes it easier when you feel supported (though I was the first and only to speak out for a long time)
I always tried to rise above the behaviour and look down on them for it, that way it can just be a disgusted look if you don't feel brave, and you can always just get up and leave in silence if something is directed at you- just make sure you always look horrified and appalled.
If you thought your Dad was being peculiar with your daughter then address it in the email and threaten the police if your daughter ever even hinted that sometimes grandpa seemed strange. Say it like.........
" I would hate to put you through police interviews at your time of life because you even slightly crossed the line again with my little girl. As you must appreciate she and my wife are the most important thing to me and, although I know you would never do anything that twisted to your own granddaughter as everyone has limits, you still put me in an awkward position, when do things like you did last visit. Do I protect my family and my right to respected or do I protect your reputation and the reasons behind my concern. I love you Dad and don't want to have to chose."
I know I'm now writing letters to your Dad but I really want to empower you to feel strong enough to get what you want out of this.
Not normally so intense but it's touched a nerve and I really care.
Hope all goes well
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