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06-11-2007, 02:48 AM

Female
How old were you when you started to Self Injure? 13
How do you SI? Cutting, burning, OD
Do you try to hide it? How? I do, I always wear long sleeves and big watches and never shorts.
Why do you SI? What do you get out of it? Because when I do it I get a minute where everything doesn't seem so big and hard. Sometimes it's for control, other times it's for punishment. There are many reasons why I do it.
Have you ever told anyone that you SI? If yes, who did you tell and how did they react? How did you tell them? My guidance counsellor asked me, my parents know but I didn't tell them, lots of other people found out when I was formed the first time.
Did you ever seek professional help for SI? If yes, did it help you? Yeah... sort of. When I started needing stitches and staples I got them and they referred me to people.
Did you ever want to seek help but didn’t? If yes why didn’t you? Because it freaks people out, it's easier to exist if you don't have to worry about people constantly asking you how you're doing, I hate lying as much as I hate talking about it and letting real people in.
Have you ever been diagnosed with a psych disorder? If yes, which one? I have PTSD, BPD and OCD, I was also diagnosed with ednos last year.Do you think there is a connection between the disorder and your SI? Yeah, it's one of the criteria for BPD... I just feel worthless because of my stressor, and I hate my body and it's become a compulsion.
Have you ever SI with the intent of suicide? Once.
If you have been to the hospital for SI, how did the staff treat you? A bajillion times, it depends really on the doctor and nurses on that day how you get treated. I find they're nicer to you when you're IP than when you're going in for stitches or with an OD.
Did you ever want to quit SI? Please explain both yes and no answers. If you did decide to try to quit about how long after you started to SI did you decide you wanted to quit? What did you try to do to quit? What helped and what did not? I do now, it's too hard. I'm seeing a psychologist, a counsellor and a psychiatrist. I'm doing everything they tell me to do, I'm really trying... :(
Do you think SI should be categorized as disorder in itself? Yes I do.
Did your SI injury get worse with time or did it stay about the same? It got much worse with time, I find myself pushing to go deeper, I just don't get the same sense of relief from little cuts as I do from big ones 'proper cuts'.
If you could find healthier ways that would give you the same effects of SI, would you stop SIing and replace it with the healthier alternative? Heck yes, if someone would find me a quick fix I'd do it in a heartbeat.
Did you ever regret SI? All the time, I'm this disgusting, tainted, scarred slasher freak.
Do you think the awareness of SI effects peoples willing/unwillingness to ‘come out’? Yes, it's become a taboo. Also, now when you hear about someone SI'ing you automatically think 'emo'.
State any comments about this questionnaire or suggestions to make it better if you like.

I think you did a really nice job. :)

State any additional comments or if you feel you want to say something that wasn’t addressed in this questionnaire.

06-11-2007, 02:48 AM	#31
.dejected	Female How old were you when you started to Self Injure? 13 How do you SI? Cutting, burning, OD Do you try to hide it? How? I do, I always wear long sleeves and big watches and never shorts. Why do you SI? What do you get out of it? Because when I do it I get a minute where everything doesn't seem so big and hard. Sometimes it's for control, other times it's for punishment. There are many reasons why I do it. Have you ever told anyone that you SI? If yes, who did you tell and how did they react? How did you tell them? My guidance counsellor asked me, my parents know but I didn't tell them, lots of other people found out when I was formed the first time. Did you ever seek professional help for SI? If yes, did it help you? Yeah... sort of. When I started needing stitches and staples I got them and they referred me to people. Did you ever want to seek help but didn’t? If yes why didn’t you? Because it freaks people out, it's easier to exist if you don't have to worry about people constantly asking you how you're doing, I hate lying as much as I hate talking about it and letting real people in. Have you ever been diagnosed with a psych disorder? If yes, which one? I have PTSD, BPD and OCD, I was also diagnosed with ednos last year.Do you think there is a connection between the disorder and your SI? Yeah, it's one of the criteria for BPD... I just feel worthless because of my stressor, and I hate my body and it's become a compulsion. Have you ever SI with the intent of suicide? Once. If you have been to the hospital for SI, how did the staff treat you? A bajillion times, it depends really on the doctor and nurses on that day how you get treated. I find they're nicer to you when you're IP than when you're going in for stitches or with an OD. Did you ever want to quit SI? Please explain both yes and no answers. If you did decide to try to quit about how long after you started to SI did you decide you wanted to quit? What did you try to do to quit? What helped and what did not? I do now, it's too hard. I'm seeing a psychologist, a counsellor and a psychiatrist. I'm doing everything they tell me to do, I'm really trying... :( Do you think SI should be categorized as disorder in itself? Yes I do. Did your SI injury get worse with time or did it stay about the same? It got much worse with time, I find myself pushing to go deeper, I just don't get the same sense of relief from little cuts as I do from big ones 'proper cuts'. If you could find healthier ways that would give you the same effects of SI, would you stop SIing and replace it with the healthier alternative? Heck yes, if someone would find me a quick fix I'd do it in a heartbeat. Did you ever regret SI? All the time, I'm this disgusting, tainted, scarred slasher freak. Do you think the awareness of SI effects peoples willing/unwillingness to ‘come out’? Yes, it's become a taboo. Also, now when you hear about someone SI'ing you automatically think 'emo'. State any comments about this questionnaire or suggestions to make it better if you like. I think you did a really nice job. :) State any additional comments or if you feel you want to say something that wasn’t addressed in this questionnaire.
.dejected