Hey guys, first of all thanks for replying to my thread,
it can feel almost disabling can't it? Depression is just so hard to get through and most people can't understand or simply won't which is frustrating. :/ I've seen a GP and I'm on a CBT course (not technically therapy but a course, I must stress that point) and on the medication Sertraline (also known as Zoloft)
I haven't really been offered anything else in the way of help but I have got the support of people at college and home/friends etc, it's just that I don't really have anyone I can talk to about everything that goes on in my head because sometimes it's either pretty graphic self harm or just very upsetting, and I definitely can't do that to my parents or friends or anyone I know, it'll just be too much to put on them.
I didn't know whether I should get a councillor.. I'm in the UK so I didn't know if as an adult you had to pay for one or could access any services through the NHS?
Sometimes I don't even know what triggers my self harm, I think it's just my way of coping with bad days, but I'm sure that when the cat scratched me the other day that seriously triggered me, just seeing them on my arm sort of set things off. People know about my self harm but they don't know any extent or detail with it, they just know that I self harm and that's it, I don't like to tell them what I use etc so I normally dodge the questions.
It does help to have company, because a lot of the time when I'm really down I just can't face being with people as in, talking to them and striking up conversation but if I sit with them it can sometimes help. It's just that most of the time things seem hopeless :/ I'm trying to make sure I get out and do things that need doing but I'm at the stage in life where I'm ending college and need to know where I'm going from there, it's just really stressful and I'm not sure what to do with it all.
I know I need to keep reminding myself that the feelings do pass, even if it means they're still there, they do lessen to be more bearable, I need to remember that so thanks for saying.
I will try to get out more and do more things, it's just the motivation to force myself again and again. And PassedExpectations, if you can send me things on how to change my thinking, I'd most appreciate it. What's this multi step plan you use for avoiding harming? Do you think you could PM me more details please?
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