Maybe. Thanks for replying.
Last time I was admitted I said I didn't want to go to Ward 10 (the ward that is being shut down) but they said if I needed an admission then the ward I was admitted to was irrelevant and then a few days later threaded to put me on a section 2 to that ward. Then whilst I was there I was stuck in dorms, didn't see a doctor even once for admission assessment and saw a patient be resuscitated and then die literally at my room door because of a bad reaction shed had to a med for a few days but no doctor had been available at all in that time. Because of my own issues (and I'm aware this is my responsibility), I won't sleep in a dorm. I would rather not sleep. Which is what happened last time. It's in my care plan that I won't benefit from an admission to ward 10 or in a shared room but you have to go where the beds are. One of the other wards is also closing this year. If I knew I would be at the other hospital then I would probably agree because I feel almost totally out of energy. They said you can't pick and choose though.
I'm struggling with my mood and mainly with self harm thoughts. My self harm has escalated to a pretty dangerous level. The reasons why depend on how I'm feeling. Sometimes it is to get rid of the evil within me. Sometimes it is to keep myself and people safe and other times I just need to shut up the command thoughts. I feel like I'm going round in circles. I just can't continue like this but I don't see things can ever change.
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