Yeah, sometimes I do want to get better. I guess that's probably a better way to look at it than worrying that imperfection means everyone will give up on me.
I'm still not sure if I want to reach out to my friends... or if they'll just think I'm being manipulative/attention-seeking... how do you even tell someone that you're seriously considering ending your life sometimes? Part of me feels like it'd be great to talk to them, and part of me feels like I'd only be making things so much worse.
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