in the long run... to get over the fear you need to touch the books over and over, without doing any compulsions (gloves, washing hands, hand sanitizer, holding it with tissues, thinking things to make the anxiety lower). it will feel very uncomfortable, but the only way to make the fear go away is to face it many times and teach your body and mind not to react to it... you've got to sit with the anxiety, and not fight it. it is like a wave, you've got to ride it all the way up to its peak and then back down. doing a compulsion or ritual is like an escape hatch part way up. its really tempting to take. the only problem is that it sends you back to where you started, still having to face that wave, instead of being at the bottom on the other side. if you face the fear over and over, the peak will get lower and lower...
|