I can see why you'd want to give up on the NHS, but you're doing the right thing. You've been given some great advice - you have to make them understand how difficult everything is. If you SH, and I know it's such a difficult thing to open up about, I would mention it as maybe then they'd get a better idea of where you're at.
Only other thing that may help is ensuring you have a good support network around you.
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