I don't see you as a fraud, but do totally relate to feeling that way (I often consider my abuse to not be bad as I don't remember it). It's painful, isn't it. I just wonder if it's hurting you to compare your abuse to others', I can only imagine it makes you feel worse unnecessarily, but understand where it comes from (after all, when you're little and all the horrible stuff is going on, it seems that often the adults are very invalidating, so that kind of carries over when you're an adult, on some level you think 'well, if the adults didn't take it seriously, then there's nothing to take seriously'... but the adults were wrong) Plus I tend to think that minimising your own abuse does, perhaps on some level in your mind helps you not have to face the pain of it sometimes... but it's just replaced with another pain (the 'can my story be heard?' pain).
I just feel that the adult you does not need judgement or criticism for the way you've learnt to relate... and that the first rule of change is to accept, as it sounds like you're working hard to do.
Have worded that horribly inarticulately, but hopefully you get where I'm coming from :P
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