Jack,
I am sorry that you are feeling this way. I know only too well how hard it is to pretend to be ok. A counsellor I saw last week when I told her about me acting as though I ok to others said that to do so I must have some part of me that is like that and with time you will get that part of you back properly. I think there is a lot of truth in that. One thing that helps me is to admit that I am not ok. I often don't say why I am not ok usually just responding with "no not really but I don't want to talk about it" or "I'm just having a bad day, I'll be ok though". I find I get a feeling of relief to admit that every thing isn't hunky dory without talking about stuff I'd rather not talk about.
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