ok... maybe things won't be entirely ok. i mean, things are never totally ok. the goal here isn't to feel good all the time, that is impossible for anyone. the goal is to feel better than you do at the moment. that is a goal for every day. and it is a goal that you can meet in very small pieces. and eventually you'll feel much better overall.
it is great that you're resisting the suicidal thoughts and holding off from harming. that takes a ton of effort, and you're doing a great job.
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