Hey,
It's good that you've been trying to avoid SH - it shows that you really want to put the effort into recovery.it's good too that you managed to stop for so long - it means that you can do it again :D
Maybe if getting help last time helped you it would help again?
Sorry to hear about your melt down - maybe you could have an emergency plan (someone to call/something to do) to distract yourself in case it happens again?
I'm sure that the people who helped you last time will be able to help again, they won't be disappointed, I'm sure they will understand that relapses do happen and will help you through again.
xxx
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