[secret squirrel]

I am nearing the end of my time at a MBT (mentalisation based treatment) Day Unit for people with BPD. My main reason for going there was to sort out the self harm and learn to manage my emotions in a healthier way. However, after 18 months of intensive treatment, my self harm is worse than it was at the beginning and I feel totally out of control with my emotional states.

I feel like a complete failure. I don't want to criticise this form of therapy or put anyone else off trying it as it does work for many people. But obviously not for me.

I am not sure what to do next. When I mentioned to one of the therapists that maybe I could try another kind of therapy, she said seemed to think that there was no point. I felt really upset by that - maybe she's right. Maybe no therapy can help me.

Another comment that got me thinking was made by someone from the Crisis Team who first met me 18 years ago, when I first entered adult MH services. She said that maybe I should live with my MH problems and accept that I will always self harm. Part of me feels angry and like I have been written off. But part of me thinks maybe she's right. But my selfharm means that I am in constant pain, have to have hospital treatment and surgery. And I am also risking life and limb. I have been lucky so far but my luck will run out.

I really don't know what to do. Should I push for more therapy (like DBT, which I haven't tried) or just accept my situation? Does anyone have experience of therapies for BPD or self harm and did they work?