I think it's anger/frustration/inconvenience that triggers me, or a lack of control. Yesterday was probably the worst SI episode I've ever had, and it was after going nearly 24 hours with no sleep, trapped in a noisy room with nowhere else to go. Now that I've slept and am in a much more comfortable place, I'm feeling better.
I'm noticing that a little while before I actually SI, when I'm just starting to get upset, I will consciously think, "I'm probably going to SI later." I just haven't figured out how to turn my mental state around so that I don't end up doing it. And I'm worried that, now that my usual method isn't doing it for me anymore, I might change methods soon. It's like something I used to do to take control of my feelings has completely overpowered me and is now in control of me, and that's scary.
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