Hi,
I'm here more often than I would like at themoment. I'm really struggling.
Today Im close to tears and I have no idea how I'm managing to hold back. I want to curl up and hide from the world.
My husband seems to have decided that he will hand in his notice at work tomorrow. I understand why, in fact I encouraged him to do so but I hope he's not acting in haste. It was only an idea last night and not smething I expected an immediate response to.
He's performing poorly and is likely to be disciplined so it's a way of avoiding this and seeking a new opportunity with a clean record. I don't know. I'm stressed by the performance management he's under but I'll be stressed by the lack of money and the lack of job. Which is worse?
I hate this, I want to harm myself to let go of the tension in side of me, but I'll be letting him and everyone aroundme down by doing so. I harmed last Tuesday, my husband was really disappointed in me. I on't want to do it again but I don't know how to cope with everything otherwise.
I want to scream nd let it all out, but that's not possible either.
I feel physically sick.
Aaaaragh.
Liz
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