Originally Posted by
richshine
Hey Bluelillies - Being bullied for that many years can have lasting affects on someone emotionally and physically. With you saying that you can be a bit of a pushover and don't really stand up for yourself is because you were bullied. In fact being happy when you are alone right there shows the affects of the trauma. Have you tried to talk to anyone about what happened to you from 9to12 years old? It will help you heal. See you have so much bottled up inside that you need to get out. You will feel better by talking. You can even write what happened down if you can't talk about it. That's just a suggestion but if you want to lead a better life not alone you might want to give this a try.
Stay strong hun!
If you ever need to talk or just want to vent my PM box is always open.
I did once try to talk to my parents about it and they just said that I had a misunderstanding. They said that they knew the kids from my primary school and that they all came from good homes and that they would never have done anything with a bad intention. I get that maybe the intention may not have been bad but, well, kids can be cruel. Really cruel. And I guess after that, I never really bothered to try talking to them again. I suppose I probably should talk to someone about it but I'm not used to talking about this type of stuff. And it's always pushed down my list of priorities - I always forget that it happened, to be honest and I just... I guess I just never really took time out to resolve it.
Maybe I should try to talking to someone like a psychologist or something. I don't know. I know I should but it just seems... very strange to sit down and talk to someone about this. To be honest, I'm terrified that I will open my mouth and just burst into tears or something.
Originally Posted by
JaimeIsBroken
I'm sorry for what happened to you. I think us girls have it a little easier and worse at the same time when it come to bullying. It seems that most of the bullying toward us is emotional instead of physical. Glad you began to move on from it.
It makes sense that bullying will or can lead to a temporary to life long sense of diminished esteem. Sexual assault in some ways is also a form of bullying and it has huge affects on self-esteem.
Trust and paranoia is very common from any type of assault. Let's face it, bullying is an assault. Being assaulted or bullied does give us a sense of being unworthy of good things. Often when we have lived a pattern of discomfort when around others we do seek the lonesome but safe comfort of solitude.
I feel that way now but I never was bullied in school. My reasons are a different kind of assault. Yes I think it can be as a result of being bullied.
Welcome back to the thread. I'm glad to meet you, but sorry for why you are here.
I never thought about the differences between emotional and physical bullying. But I guess you're right. That's definite food for thought.
I suppose that I do have trust issues and I understand that you're saying that they could quite possibly be linked to being bullied. That makes sense. I am sorry to hear about your assault, too - and I'm sorry that you had to go through that. I don't know what type of assault you went through but no type of assault can ever be pleasant. Nor is it ever deserved.
The both of you have been so helpful - thank you for sharing what you said with me. It really did help. It's just... it's nice to know that there are people out there who understand.
Hugs.