I'm sorry you're struggling so much :/ I'm a bit short on words right now, but, I really hope you're alright. You can make it through. It's wonderful you were able to stop for two years- I'm sure you'll be able to make it for many more while you're trying to recover. Talking to friends can be a bit difficult, but, do you think it would help? If they're supportive and whatnot, I'm sure they won't mind helping you out a bit.
I hope you feel better... wish I had some better words to say that might help. Don't hesitate to send a PM if you need to talk about anything. Keep strong *hugs*
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