Hi Star runner,
This is so understandable to me...
Originally Posted by
star runner
I just really, really want to pretend all of this isn't real because i feel like such a failiure and taking meds and seeing Psychs / cpn's just reinforces that feeling.
You need to think realistically about what the risks of coming off meds are for you. It seems you have started considering them, and that's a good thing. In the end it's up to you what treatment decisions you make, but keeping people informed is best as it gives you more of a safety net if it doesn't work out.
Is there anything else that you could do that would give you a greater sense that you are in control of your own life and treatment? It seems you might be missing that?