[Cedrus]

This is something I am RELLY struggling with. I would say that my self harm has decreased in frequency but certainly not in severity. I went from cutting myself to burning and then burns can take months to heal. But the thing causing me stress is that every single time it is healed, i last a week or two without doing it and then the rage gets overwhelming again and i give in, almost as if i can't tolerate not having any wounds on me.

I have a burn healing at the moment and i am in the mindset. yet again, that i will NOT self harm, almost believing that i will never harm myself again. My whole thoughts regarding it change, and i will be certain i will stop this. I get so fed up of having to look after the wouds. I REALLY want to stop but I'm scared, because I know once it is healed I won't be safe. I literally have no urges to self harm when its healing and i get really peed of with having to look after it. But once its gone, im not safe. a rage will return and i will impulsively do it again. Im so stuck in this cycle.

Is anyone else stuck in this cycle too? Can you relate to this? Has anyone broken this cycle? If so, how?

Thanks for reading.