Hiya, I completely agree with what's been written just above this post. Please try to see this as an opportunity to get better. I can completely relate to not feeling 'ready for change' but (in my opinion, at least!) there never is one single moment of clarifying realisation when it comes to eating disorders. It's rare to ever feel totally ready to change. Therefore you might as well try as soon as possible because things can only get worse, as you've said yourself. I personally went through senior school (the equivalent to your high school) completely adament that 'I was fine' and too stubborn to get treatment. God, I wish I'd gone IP then. Since school, my ED has screwed up my life so much. It might sound silly but with eating disorders, the motto 'sooner better than later' definitely applies to the vast majority of people. Also, if you try to come to some sort of understanding with your parents and admit that you probably need some sort of help, they might be more lenient and give you a bit of breathing space and freedom to decide on a treatment plan with which you're more comfortable. They might also start to recognise that you are in fact aware of the problem at hand and they should respect you all the more for it. This might not sound like much right now when everything must be pretty damn scary BUT respect often comes with its own little perks...like getting to make more of your own choices and getting to hold onto boyfriends! Hang in there, sweetie! You can and WILL get through this xx
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