I get very frustrated with people who have this opinion on BPD. As I've been in the mental health services for many years I have come across a variety of opinions with different nurses and doctors.
The consultant at my local hospital does not believe in BPD. He believes it is just "acting up" to cause trouble and to distress others.
Thankfully though I was moved to another acute which was further from home but with a much more understanding consultant. He put me on medication and accepted that BPD is an illness. He empathised with how difficult it can be.
I was also put in touch with my now psychotherapist and he is specialist for personality disorders. He understands that it is not our choice to feel the way we feel. He said simply 'why would anyone choose to feel that way' or feel the need to harm ourselves etc.
You don't pick and choose your symptoms or have total control over them. I guess sometimes we do have to try and take some responsibility but that isn't meant in a negative way. We can't choose the symptoms or always control them but at times we may have the capacity to think "okay I have this symptom and I know I need to do x y z to cope with it" which it sounds like you tried to use today by seeking the help of crisis team. I'm sorry they were so unsupportive though. I believe at times we are unable to take responsibility at all, at the very darkest times of BPD.
Hugs. I hope what I've said makes sense. x
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