Hope fades.
And, I am facing some of the most painful feelings in therapy.
To do with my lack of sense of self worth, and all the compensatory defences.
I know my task is to have compassion for them. But that feels very difficult. Especially when they're the kind of 'issues' I've been bullied about. And I just want the ache in my chest to go away, for someone to love me and make it better. I just want to really be important to someone, be valued in all of me, not to have to be a certain way, not have to be 'perfect'.
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