There are so many reasons, all of them quite silly I suppose - my parents would kill me and they told me I'd get sectioned anyway, which I guess is what I'm scared of. And plus I'd be going in patient in Germany. I speak fluent-ish German but the idea of staying here, having treatment in German, not being able to leave for an indefinite amount of time... It just makes me feel worse. The best thing I can do is pretend to be fine until I can get back to uni in October. It seems like a long time.
Home could be fine, or it could be a hotbed of emotional abuse. If my parents find my scars they'll have me sectioned. Or lock me in the house and watch me constantly. Either way, they'll have cruel words to say about me anyway. My best friend told me I could stay with him, but when it comes to the crunch I don't know whether I'll be strong enough to tell my parents I'm leaving. Especially because I know they'd stop me. This is all such a mess. I don't know what to do.
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