The problem is that i've moved in with my Gran and she doesn't know, in fact no one in my family knows how bad things are, there is only one friend who knows what's going on and she is away on holiday from tomorrow for a week. This is why the idea of a home treatment team is freaking me out - i can't have people coming over to my house, i won't let them, i really hope that's not just seen as me being unco-oporative... I've missed 2 calls from them too unintentionally and i cant ring back because i dont have the number (it was on private - but i know the calls were from them because only one other person has that phone number). It's just all stressing me out right now. I'm worried they're going to turn up here anyway, i'm worried they're going to try and force me into taking medication, i'm worried they'll keep asking questions until i fall apart, i'm worried that they'll know i'm not being completley honest with them and equally i'm worried that i'll break down and end up being honest. If i hadn't missed the call and knew what was going on it would be so much easier right now.
|