Lost is ok and its great you are dealing with stuff. Sweet jeebus another Librarian. I had no clue. but then you are mates with chelsea........ :P
I dont think we can answer how bad it would be for you. Only you can know that. Perhaps talk it over in therapy and tell your GF too? Keeping it in isnt a good idea either way.
As for the anger, well you are entitled to feel shitty about it. i dont know the circs but id imagine you invested quite a bit of yourself into the person you did it for and they ultimately let you down?
All ill say is they cant hurt you anymore. Only you can do that. Anger toward others ultimately hurts ourselves. forgive their failings, forgive your failings and learn from it. You will be stronger for it.
....at the end of the day, if you cut no one will blame you. It was something you were rather expert at for quite some time. I quit smoking 6 years ago but i still want one at times.
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