Sorry it has been so long but here is another bit of the story for any one who was intrested.
Five
“I have to watch my family?” I asked sullenly and I new if I was still abele to do such things in my new angel form the colour would be draining from my face. Angel prison sounded like a better idea. In fact a prisoner of war camp accompanied by physical torture would be preferable. I didn’t want to watch my family’s grief over my disappearance, to them there would be no reason, just the fact that one day I was there as Harper in the middle and the next I was gone cutting the children of Mark and Linda Burns from seven down to six.
I didn’t want to watch as Danny’s giant sized 12 feet ate away at the floor as he paced waiting for the news, as he prayed silently to a god he tried so hard to believe in that I would just pull through that I would open my eyes again . He promised his god that he would look after me forever even if I was brain damaged, he promised things he couldn’t keep if only I would open my eyes again, but only I new than what the doctor would say when he walked through that door, that there would be no bargaining with god, that I had slipped away.
“I will do anything else.” I pleaded with Willow as I felt two tears splash out of my eyes and run down my cheeks. So angels could cry it seemed strange. “There must be some really disgusting jobs. Maybe I could clean toilets or something? Really dirty toilets.”
“ I know this is hard Harper but they have to go on living with the way you chose to leave them. You should see what you have done, you will also see there where many many reasons to live. Once your heart truly realises what you have done and once your eyes truly see that they should of stayed your punishment will be over” Willow said gently yet firmly as she started rummaging threw another draw pulling out various strange bit’s a pieces
“OK I am sorry I should of stayed there.” I shouted
“You don’t mean that yet Harper your heart doesn’t feel it you can’t lie to an angel.”
I wished I could say that Willow was wrong but I still believed my suicide was the right thing. I had done this for my family as well as my self. I had been the moppey one lately the smell of sour milk in the house that they just couldn’t find to clear up. The person that could go to Disney land and find the “magic” that happened there to be nothing more then an illusion portrayed by many short men in big outfits and a crazy old man who thought up a talking mouse to be his best friend.
My family loved me I was sure of that and I loved them more then I could ever describe so I made the sacrifice. with out me they could go back to how it used to be. To when Harper didn’t drag everything down into her sudden depression. With out me they could live like they deserved but I did not want to watch them because ultimately I had to live with out them to now. I had to be forever with out them and that was going to hurt like hell.
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