I don't think your conselor was giving up on you, I think she was making a valid point that until you decide to help yourself and motivate yourself there's nothing she can do because you have to do it yourself, but she can be a support along the way.
Why are you denying meds? Have you been on them before? They can really help when you find the right med or combination of meds, and it's better than being miserable.
No one has a great life 100 percent of the time. Just because you don't see their painful things doesn't mean they don't have any.
I don't think you're a failure, but if you keep telling yourself that you are and keep denying help like meds, the negative cycle is just going to keep repeating.
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