[Puck]

I really really really dont get on with either of my workers (support worker and cpn) i always give people beneffit of the doubt but they really make a strong negative reaction within me. Its not fear.. i dont know how to explain it.. I just repell them i dont know. They make my stomach turn and make me want to disappear off the face of planet.

Im new to adult services, i've only been with them a month. I haven't even seen them that much.. but this isnt a post saying i dont like them because they dont get me or the normal anxieties over starting with someone new... its shere gut wrenching i dont like you. Im not normal to be like that.

I cant talk to them at all... i don't even want to write things down for them.. after they saw me today i seriously thought 'sod it, i dont want to anywhere near me or a part of my life' I dont know if its the non complient part of me coming through. I dont want to see them again. Im going to give them a bit more time to make up my mind. But id like to know whether changing cpn's or sw's is possible?? Also because i think they have issues with my age... i feel like they're treating me like a 5 year old with self esteem issues... which isnt me i am actually very unwell according to my old doctor. Also they're putting words in my mouth and deciding who i am without hearing me. I dont even want to really bother working with them.. its how strongly i feel towards them.

You know when a cat gets a bad idea of someone and the puff up and hiss at them.. i feel like thats what im doing (obviously not literally)

So yes changing key workers or i can i refuse to see them and just see the doc once in a while? I just need general advice..