[The Hierophant]

i've been advised, by friends, parents, & tutors to go back to my mental health worker at uni. it's obvious to everybody in real life that i'm not coping.

the only person i want to see, if i have to see someone is my old uni mental health worker, i connected with her, she helped.

the only thing is,

she was the one that referred me to EIT, who passed my onto the consultant psych, who then passed me on to psychotherapy. & the referral for psychotherapy never came through.

my mental health worker was really good, until (the way i see it) she thought she'd passed me on to EIT, who sadly couldn't work with me. i could go to my gp & be re-referred or chased up for psychotherapy, but i don't like the staff up at the centre at all, which would cause me more stress which, supposedly i don't know.

i'm difficult case, i'm aware of that, all doctors from all specialties agree. i know, that is i went into her office monday, i could arrange to see her, but i don't know how,
she promised me she'd go with me to the EIT assessment, which she didn't & then promptly never contacted me again.

i've not been told i cant contact her, or anything, i realize she may have felt in over her head with me, but other than that, i don't know what i can do.

there are so many things in (so-called) real-world that isn't fitting again, thats not right. & there is a lot riding on this right now, riding on me being ok enough, a degree, a flat, a job, 10 14 year olds, my boyfriend.

how the hell do i go back to seeing her? she's never told me i can't, but she just left me, when i needed help.

any advice, at all, would be greatful.