RYL Forums - View Single Post - More censoring, is the R&V even serving a purpose anymore?

Cryptic. · 02-01-2011, 06:05 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by -LetMeSign-

Sarah, look sweet, I'm not being funny and I'm not being harsh but it really is starting to sound like you think this thread and the examples used are taken from your own R&V threads. Fair enough, you may have written some stuff that people find triggering or 'glamorous' or whatever else the problems may be and I get that it clearly bothers you so you feel the need to write it down in whatever way you feel necessary but can you not see that writing it in such a way that is glamorizing SH or any other behaviour(s) one may engage in, is going to be damaging at some point to either yourself, or another member?

I see where you're coming from regarding the trigger labels being removed and IMHO, that was silly. (but that's a different topic, completely.)

There is a difference between someone writing that they cut xxxxxxx times and it was proper amazing and it gave them such a massive high to see all the blood and have xxxx stitches and to then take the ******** pills they've saved up and then b/p for xxxxxxxx hours because it was so ****ing good and it made them feel immense or to write that your day / night was difficult. You struggled with SH and numerous other behaviours and you're struggling. Okay, it made you feel fab so you want to write about the release it gave you but to go into massive detail like that is going totally off the mark. There are quite a few younger members on here now and for them to see something like that would be worrying.

So, RYL is supposed to keep you safe, right? Or at least try to help you alongside whatever other support you've got going on. So, no matter what forum / thread you go in, why would you want to come across something like that? I'm not saying it's you, so don't be assuming I am again but, is it really necessary that you're descriptions of last nights episodes are so graphic?

I don't even know if that made sense.

Personally, I find it helpful to describe what I feel about my episodes. I find it helpful to get out why I did it, and I find it helpful to get out how I feel about it, no matter how f*ked up it may appear to other people. I've seen much worse descriptions than my own & they haven't been removed. And these descriptions weren't always in the R&V section, either.

I don't see how saying how something you do to cope with things feels good is glamorising it, to me, glamorising something is encouraging people to do it & saying it will help you & it's good for you & there's nothing wrong with it & it's not that bad to do it & that it's one of the best things to do in life.
That to me is glam'ing behaviours.

This place used to be a place you could come to, recovering or not, to express how you feel, and now it feels like if you're not in the mindset of recovery or if you are expressing things in the way that is not recovery focused, then it's not allowed.

Numbers, of course, I get why are banned, I don't want them back to be honest, I think this place is a lot better without them, I never really used them myself, and I never really wanted to either, same with food lists, it can down play other peoples problems if you say what your BMI is, and how much you binged on, and how much you consume if you're restricting, etc, that can make it competitive for other people and they may think that there problems aren't as serious or as bad, but I don't see how expressing what you feel about behaviours you do is so bad.
People have always done that here, and people still continue to do it, graphic or not.
Some people use poetry to express how they feel about the behaviours they engage in, I have in the past, most of my friends have, people write stories too, in the Creative Corner you see dozens of stories & poems on behaviours they engage in.

I understand there are impressionable younger members on here, and I wouldn't want one of them to come across a rant post that could come across as being pro & all for a certain behaviour, I wouldn't want anyone to SH/engage in ED behaviours/abuse alcohol/drugs because it was said in a post that it helps that person, but it's plastered all over this site that behaviours do something for them.
It's said all over this site that they feel better when they do xyz, that they feel good, that they're more in control, etc.
People need to accept some responsibility when they read threads, labels were removed because the majority of threads will trigger, and when I've been triggered before, I'm not going to blame the poster for it, they're entitled to express how they feel.

This site was made for people who engage in behaviours that they use to cope with & these behaviours help them feel better, feel something, help them feel in control... it's all over Em. What's the point in being told you can express yourself here if you are being restricted in saying how you feel about xyz?

I'm not going to ask for this site to allow people to "glam" their behaviours, I'm just trying to express my opinion on this certain change & I don't quite understand what I can & cannot post now.

Quote:

Originally Posted by cymraesfach

Personally, I believe that a post which puts an action such as cutting (which is a terrible way to deal with things, dangerous and harmful) in such a positive light is glamorising. This site is for recovery, not for poetic descriptions of how lovely it is to cut yourself.

Read above.

Quote:

Originally Posted by The Hierophant

I think, now, recoveryourlife is a site purely for recovery. / because i remember it never used to be, we all self harmed and we came together, that was it, with support thrown in.

there used to be a place for people who weren't ready to recover, but now it seems there isn't, changes are being bought in place and it's always the same people in these threads, & these same people all seem to not be ready to recover just yet, maybe i'm wrong.

but there they are the same people in these threads debating for the minority & i think now, that the minority are people who are in a different place to the majority & i think that minority are the people not quite ready to completely recover.

so maybe this site is focused around recovery and those recovering. & those who aren't ready are out, i don't know,

my take.

I agree.

02-01-2011, 06:05 PM	#161
Cryptic. If at first you don't succeed, try try try again. Join Date: Jan 2008 Location: UK, Surrey I am currently:	Quote: Originally Posted by -LetMeSign- Sarah, look sweet, I'm not being funny and I'm not being harsh but it really is starting to sound like you think this thread and the examples used are taken from your own R&V threads. Fair enough, you may have written some stuff that people find triggering or 'glamorous' or whatever else the problems may be and I get that it clearly bothers you so you feel the need to write it down in whatever way you feel necessary but can you not see that writing it in such a way that is glamorizing SH or any other behaviour(s) one may engage in, is going to be damaging at some point to either yourself, or another member? I see where you're coming from regarding the trigger labels being removed and IMHO, that was silly. (but that's a different topic, completely.) There is a difference between someone writing that they cut xxxxxxx times and it was proper amazing and it gave them such a massive high to see all the blood and have xxxx stitches and to then take the ****** pills they've saved up and then b/p for xxxxxxxx hours because it was so *ing good and it made them feel immense or to write that your day / night was difficult. You struggled with SH and numerous other behaviours and you're struggling. Okay, it made you feel fab so you want to write about the release it gave you but to go into massive detail like that is going totally off the mark. There are quite a few younger members on here now and for them to see something like that would be worrying. So, RYL is supposed to keep you safe, right? Or at least try to help you alongside whatever other support you've got going on. So, no matter what forum / thread you go in, why would you want to come across something like that? I'm not saying it's you, so don't be assuming I am again but, is it really necessary that you're descriptions of last nights episodes are so graphic? I don't even know if that made sense. Personally, I find it helpful to describe what I feel about my episodes. I find it helpful to get out why I did it, and I find it helpful to get out how I feel about it, no matter how fked up it may appear to other people. I've seen much worse descriptions than my own & they haven't been removed. And these descriptions weren't always in the R&V section, either. I don't see how saying how something you do to cope with things feels good is glamorising it, to me, glamorising something is encouraging people to do it & saying it will help you & it's good for you & there's nothing wrong with it & it's not that bad to do it & that it's one of the best things to do in life. That to me is glam'ing behaviours. This place used to be a place you could come to, recovering or not, to express how you feel, and now it feels like if you're not in the mindset of recovery or if you are expressing things in the way that is not recovery focused, then it's not allowed. Numbers, of course, I get why are banned, I don't want them back to be honest, I think this place is a lot better without them, I never really used them myself, and I never really wanted to either, same with food lists, it can down play other peoples problems if you say what your BMI is, and how much you binged on, and how much you consume if you're restricting, etc, that can make it competitive for other people and they may think that there problems aren't as serious or as bad, but I don't see how expressing what you feel about behaviours you do is so bad. People have always done that here, and people still continue to do it, graphic or not. Some people use poetry to express how they feel about the behaviours they engage in, I have in the past, most of my friends have, people write stories too, in the Creative Corner you see dozens of stories & poems on behaviours they engage in. I understand there are impressionable younger members on here, and I wouldn't want one of them to come across a rant post that could come across as being pro & all for a certain behaviour, I wouldn't want anyone to SH/engage in ED behaviours/abuse alcohol/drugs because it was said in a post that it helps that person, but it's plastered all over this site that behaviours do something for them. It's said all over this site that they feel better when they do xyz, that they feel good, that they're more in control, etc. People need to accept some responsibility when they read threads, labels were removed because the majority of threads will trigger, and when I've been triggered before, I'm not going to blame the poster for it, they're entitled to express how they feel. This site was made for people who engage in behaviours that they use to cope with & these behaviours help them feel better, feel something, help them feel in control... it's all over Em. What's the point in being told you can express yourself here if you are being restricted in saying how you feel about xyz? I'm not going to ask for this site to allow people to "glam" their behaviours, I'm just trying to express my opinion on this certain change & I don't quite understand what I can & cannot post now. Quote: Originally Posted by cymraesfach Personally, I believe that a post which puts an action such as cutting (which is a terrible way to deal with things, dangerous and harmful) in such a positive light is glamorising. This site is for recovery, not for poetic descriptions of how lovely it is to cut yourself. Read above. Quote: Originally Posted by The Hierophant I think, now, recoveryourlife is a site purely for recovery. / because i remember it never used to be, we all self harmed and we came together, that was it, with support thrown in. there used to be a place for people who weren't ready to recover, but now it seems there isn't, changes are being bought in place and it's always the same people in these threads, & these same people all seem to not be ready to recover just yet, maybe i'm wrong. but there they are the same people in these threads debating for the minority & i think now, that the minority are people who are in a different place to the majority & i think that minority are the people not quite ready to completely recover. so maybe this site is focused around recovery and those recovering. & those who aren't ready are out, i don't know, my take. I agree.
	In a world where you can be anything, be yourself.