[Stellata]

Earlier, next door [in their kids' room] had music on WAY too loud, in the room next door to my bedroom. I was kind of losing it, and have been yelling, slamming doors etc. I moved to the kitchen [where it's exceedingly freezing] to try and calm down. I was really losing it. Can't I have some peace and quiet? Can't they move a stereo away from a wall? Or use ear phones? Or just, like, have it on in a different room?

They went out, thankfully. I hope it is quiet this evening. I can't go round there and ask them to turn it down. It's probably not even THAT loud. Not to other ears. I can't go round after losing it. They'll have heard. And my flatmates are all keep in with the neighbours and be nice and he is the one that goes round cos he can like mediate and such. I'm on my own here until Tuesday.

I just go into fight mode and feel powerless and helpless with noise. It pushes into my boundaries and I don't feel safe. It feels like they're doing it to upset and bully me. I know that's unlikely, but it's how it feels and I just bypass any sensibility and go into primitive defence angry mode.

If it happens again, how can I cope without losing it? I'm so much better at regulating my emotions generally, and now this again. [PMS doesn't help, heh.]

Ideas welcome, please. Thanks.