I really need help. It's getting harder and harder to resist SI. I know I should talk to my parents, or get some professional help, but I'm too scared to talk to them about it. I know avoiding it is the wrong way to go, but, I don't now how to approach the subject. I'm not happy and I'm hiding that too.
I really don't know how I would explain those things to my parents, like why I SI. I know the main reasons as to why I do it, but there are still so many little reasons that I don't why I do it for.
I'm also afraid that my parents will put me in some sort of treatment program or a treatment facility where I'll be required to talk about my problems. I can barely talk to my friends about it, and I can barely type it here - so imagine it in front of people I've never met. When my parents found out my sister's bulemia, they put her in a treatment program at mercy hospital. She had to go to the hospital everyday, from really early in the morning to around 6pm. I'm afraid they'll do that to me, or even worse, send me away.
And going that long knowing that I don't even have access to a razor at all, would kill me. I feel helpless when I don't have a razor or a blade nearby. I feel stupid to even be thinking that way, but it's the truth.
Is it normal to feel his way about telling my parents? And is it normal to be afraid of what they'll do when they find out? I need help. PLEASE!!!
~Gwen~