Day Three- Your Parents.
Dear Momma.
I don't know how you managed to put up with me but you have. There's still a lot of things that are unsettled between us + I think you know this just as much as I do but you're too scared to admit it. I love you, I really do. How could I not? But there's certain things you do that I really don't agree with. I'd never tell you this because I couldn't have you hate me again but I really wish you knew how much I want you to stop. You confide in me because I'm 19 now + you say I'm an adult but I sometimes want you to think before you tell me something because even though I'm 19, I'm still your child Momma. I still need you to know that I don't need to know everything that's going on in your life. I don't know.. Maybe now you trust me enough to tell me your secrets? I just wish I could tell you mine because there's so much you don't know about me still.. I know that you always say that you have my best interest at heart when you try + make decisions for me but when are you going to realise that I need to make my own mistakes in order for me to live my own life? I'm grateful that you care so much but I just need you to sometimes back down + let me take charge of my own stuff. Thankyou, honestly, for everything. You really are an amazing woman + I admire you for your strength + courage in everything you do. Some day, I hope to have the same amount of wisdom that you do now. I love you Momma, from the bottom of my heart. x
Dear Daddy.
I miss you + I hate that you live over 200 miles away from me. We haven't had the best relationship that people have seen between a man + his daughter but I'm not going to deny the fact that that's down to you. It's your fault we didn't speak for 3 years + when you nearly died, I didn't even know. No-one from your side of the family even bothered to contact me when you went into hospital + I'm still pissed off that you didn't even tell me about your damn wedding, let alone invite me. It's okay, I'll learn to forgive you some day because I really do love you Daddy. Momma hates the fact that I pretty much idolise you + sometimes I do wonder why because you're not exactly the greatest of people. You used to push Momma around, didn't you? I've seen you do it + I've seen the marks you've left her. Oh, and you really scared me the other day when you told your wife that if she didn't shut up then you'd break her jaw. I don't understand why you'd even consider saying something like that. You've got such a temper on you that you make me want to cry, + I hate to admit it but I'm just like you. I get my short fuses from you + it's your genes that have made me who I am because I'm just like you Daddy, in every single way. My looks, my build, my shape. I even have hands + feet like you. Are you proud of me? Are you proud of what you made, then forgot + picked up again? I was your first. I just wish you'd calm down + see what you've got before you lose everything again. I don't want to spend the next God knows how many years without a Daddy. I spent to long trying to find you again. Please keep me in your life, I really love you. x