Of course there is hope, you are special and you deserve to be living. You need to start believing in yourself, no matter how much support you have around you and no matter how many times people tell you you are smart you are never going to get anywhere unless you start believing it yourself. Just a little bit, just enough to think 'i can do this and i am gonna do this'. People care about you. No one else can control how you feel, you're the only one who can do that.
Would it help if you wrote everything down, all of it about how you're feeling, it always seems to help me a bit.
You're strong, you've got this far, you need to try and keep fighting it. One step at a time!
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