Hello,
I've been having the same problem lately, if I'm honest. I was diagnosed with depression/anxiety and currently see both a psychiatrist/nurse fortnightly (over about ten months). My sleep pattern is non-existent and my GP refuses to give me anything to help it, so I spend my time yoyo-ing between my GP and the psychiatric unit.
Their CBT seems to consist of talking things over and over with me and giving me (what I see as) unhelpful help sheets. I know I shouldn't take such a negative view on what is essentially the way to recovery, but like you I am not seeing the benefit of it at all.
Self-harm always has a kind of... safety, if you will. To be blunt, you know it works. Yes, you look back on it as unhelpful and so forth but at the time you think you need it. But don't give up! It is a hard battle, but I suppose we have to go through these sessions, however much we don't see the benefit of them. Maybe something will work; that's what you've got to hold on to.
I suggest you continue persevering. Stick at it, build up your relationship with the councillor and try to be as open as you can, because that's what helps in the long run. It is frustrating, I know it is! You should actually discuss this with your counsellor, as they will be quite receptive to your own thoughts on how the sessions are going. If you set up a mental block in your mind of "this isn't going to work", it probably won't. Keep an open mind, and keep yourself safe. It's what I'm trying!
If you ever need to talk, or discuss this further, feel free to PM me.
Take care.
C.
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