My heart goes out to you about your sister. Any loss is difficult but losing someone young suddenly ranks high up there.
Congratulations on your previous 4 years.
You said you had moved. Do you have a support system where you moved to? Or a grief or even a regular counselor? It seems like you have a lot on your plate and it is only natural that you would go back to the coping mechanism that worked best previously.
Try to use the supports that you have around you and build up the support system by supplementing with online (ryl), diaries, a counselor etc.
You have a lot going on and deserve help getting through it.
Take care
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