Hello
*waves* i don't know anything about the american health system so i'm afraid i can't really help or give you any practical advice there.
I'm sorry you lost your job and everything, that must be rough.
You say you don't have the support you used to, well can you build up a new support system for yourself? Do you have friends you can call and chat with, or can sit with you when you're really low?
It's okay to be scared, really it is.
I'm sorry, i'm struggling to think today, but i wanted you to know that someone had read this and was thinking of you.
Do you have a plan of what you do when you start feeling like this? Like, idk, when you start feeling low you have a nice bath, then paint your nails, then if you're still feeling bad you do a crossword etc etc? Sometimes a little pampering can help us feel better about ourselves and distraction can really help keep those self-destructive thoughts a little further back in our minds.
Take care hun
Ruth
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