Why do you want to die?
Rather, why do you not want to live?
Despite feeling depressed now there is nothing to say that you cannot live life and live a happy life, that you cannot recover from this; you certainly can recover from this depression. Though things are difficult now and suicide feels rational, (I know, I've been there too) there will come a time where you are happy you didn't die. But you've got to be alive to see it, yknow?
Did the crisis team give you any strategies about getting through this? I agree you should hold off the decision to end your life until you are not depressed; only then will you know if it is truly the right now. You might as well wait until you are feeling a bit better. Please though, do not end your life. Life does get better, please hold onto that.
I hope you have some strategies to keep yourself safe, and also, can call the crisis team if you're feeling so unsafe or like acting on these thoughts.
Wishing you all the very best, please, be strong xx
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