Yeah but she flipped like a long time before this bad time and now its been a few months since then, if that makes sense on an imaginary timeline. She know's I have treatment but I can't talk to her about any more details than that and I don't want to tell her anything else. She's not the sort of person you can talk to about anything like inside feelings and things as she doesn't talk about her own (she doesn't have anything wrong though, like 120% sure). No one has ever seen what I'm like when I'm going to do it as I avoid everyone and I make sure I am on my own and no one will come into my room or anything. I have only lied to her about this one as I couldn't avoid having this arm out around her and I couldn't let her touch my arm at that time so I needed to tell her it was injured before I screamed when she touched it whcih would have been even worse. I just don't have this arm out infront of anyone if I have cut recently and if I have to wear an outfit for an occasion I wear long sleeves and stuff like it's easily avoidable and I put a bracelet tightly over this big scar.
Thanks for your advice. It's helpful having someone else's point of view. She's in the room next to me and I will probs see her later on and if not then tomorrow morning for sure and I don't know what to do like when I first see her. She must hate me for lying to her? My friend who knows said she seemed pretty hurt that I lied but I could no way tell her. I was in a really volatile state at the time.
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