There have definitely been times when it seemed completely rational to me. I never cut deep enough to risk anything, and for a long time it made total sense. A bottle of beer or a cigarette aren't good for you either, but neither of them are viewed anything like self injury. It's not that I ever thought it was healthy, but I didn't think it was any worse than any of the other stupid things teenagers do, and I was frustrated by how much crap I was getting because of it. For instance, scores of kids at my former school were disciplined for drug or alcohol, but most of them were allowed to stay at school. My very mild self injury got me thrown out. I never could understand that. Doesn't drug use indicate mental unease to? And it's probably just as risky, if not more. Besides the fact that it's illegal ... and that it is likely to influence other kids.
But in the end self injury doesn't really seem to work. This forum is full of people who hate self injury, who are struggling with self injury, who have been hurt by their habit of self injury. And a lot of people do stop. If it was okay why would so many be motivated to leave it behind?
I know my thoughts are rambling and unclear here, sorry about that. I know I don't have a real argument, considering that my whole claim is that self injury isn't any worse than other things ... that are probably not rational themselves. I have to say, I'm pretty conflicted. When I think about the question I think, yeah, it's rational, what's the big deal? But then again I've worked my ass off over the last two months not to cut, so I obviously don't even believe that myself.
|