[Cryptic.]

1. List the ways that you self-harm <no tip sharing, be generic>
Cutting, pulling my hair, hitting myself, hitting objects, banging my head, ODing, & ED behaviors.
2. How do these behaviors help you survive?
I feel better, I feel more in control, I feel I've successfully punished myself, I've calmed down the urges for at least a while.
3. How does this behavior give me a sense of control?
I don't really know... I just feel more in control of things when I'm doing it rather than not doing it.
4. How/Why does this behavior release endorphins (the happy factor) and make me feel better?
I don't know how to answer this question... it's a bit confusing.
5. How does this behavior give me revenge?
I don't really do it for revenge.
6. How does this behavior punish me?
It hurts me.
7. When and why did you start this behavior?
I was about 7 when I first started, and I was very angry and I felt very out of control, and I started to hurt myself.
8. How/Why does this behavior bring me affection, care, or emotional closure? (How does it comfort you? if this applies)
The after math. I have to take care of my damage ie; clean up my wounds, bandage them, etc. Also others take care of me and comfort me. I crave this. I guess I feel like with my self harm, it makes me feel better, and at times, nobody else can do this for me, so it cares for me I guess. Or the people that can do this, aren't there to do it. So, I feel self harm helps me feel better.

Copy and paste this section, delete the lines that do not apply to you, leaving only the ones that do:
I want to express my rage at myself
I hate myself
I want to distract myself from other pain
I want to numb my feelings
I have a message to give that I cant' say directly
I am asking for help
I want to be rescued
I believe my body is a battleground
I want to cleanse myself
I want to somehow atone for my sins
I want to express my shame
I am trying to express my pain
I am taking over where my abuser left off
I am trying to bring my emotions under control
I am trying to get "high"
I am trying to manage my flashbacks/memories
I am trying to release emotional tension
I need a release valve
I need to get into a "neutral zone"
I am trying to buy myself time by focusing attention on physical rather than emotional pain

Now, think about your reason(s) for harming, list 3-5 things you could do instead.
1. Talk to someone.
2. Watch a movie/show I like.
3. Role play.

Which of the following are true for you? (Again delete the ones that do not apply for you)
Self-harm doesn't hurt anyone but me and it really doesn't hurt me either(I used to believe this)
It's my body, I can do what I want with it(I on/off believe this)
It's no big deal and shouldn't upset anyone(I on/off believe this)
If I don't hurt myself this way, my pain will be worse
I need to be punished for what I did
It just shows how bad a person I am
The scars are there for a reason, they remind me of my shame/need for punishment(They are there for a reason, they do remind me of a lot, but not the shame one, the punishment one is true though)

FINALLY! I'm adding one more question to this list, what stage are you on in the 6 stages of recovery?
3, 4, 5 & 6 are my next steps.
I've already done 1 & 2, but regarding 6, I have been recovering for quite a while, but I have had way too many slip ups, & I don't believe I can be considered in recovery, more in a relapse than recovery right now.