I agree that you cannot always protect people from what they are going to feel. I don't think being twenty years old means he is too young to deal with anything like this, he has no choice because of his girlfriend and you are dealing with issues whilst being a year younger. Whatever the reasons were that she hung herself, they weren't anything to do with you. I think that you should attend martial arts training again if it is something that you enjoy.
You appear to be quite close to Phil. Do you think that you could talk to him about this? Don't deny everything and say that you are fine when you aren't. Just keep yourself safe and let the other guy know that you do care about him, but want to continue martial arts training. You could even try talking to the other guy?
Take care xx
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